…a pain in the backside – especially when it comes to kids!
Okay maybe I’m being a bit harsh. Poor Ms Maya has lost her nanny and the first friend she ever made, started school and aftercare, got a new nanny, has to share her space with countless other new faces all competing for one adult’s attention and moved into a new house. As much as we’ve tried to make keep her schedule as flexi as possible and as much as Maya has taken to it, this may have been a little too much all at once. And I’m sure she feels like her whole world has been turned upside down – and for some reason, it seems to be me she’s blaming.
For instance, when I offer her delicious things she loves: oats, juice, biscuits, tea… she screams at ‘Me! I don’t want anything.’ I’m sure if she’d really love to say ‘I don’t want anything from you!’ And then five minutes later she comes running, pleading, whining and almost crying at the same time, begging for the very thing she said she didn’t want. As if I’ve been holding out on her or had denied her the treat in the first place.
And then every night this week she’s made a scene about going to bed. She screams for me – such an angry little scream like I’ve abandoned her. Granted we have put her back in the cot because we sold her bed and haven’t had a chance to buy her a new one… but the screaming and the yelling for mommy or daddy for 15 minutes straight… Yes, I let her scream herself to sleep the night before last. I was gatvol and so was daddy.
Last night she had her first temper tantrum – yelling and screaming and literally going red in the face, arms flailing, body being thrown about on the couch. She was going beserk! And all because I offered her tea and she said she didn’t want anything. It got quite serious. Hein and I just watched in amazement. We thought we might have to knock her out or something because it seemed to us like she was possessed. So now poor sausage is not only dealing with physical changes but emotional changes too. I read this helpful article on Parenting.co.za which made me put things in perspective. This was a particulalry clarifying sentence:
‘Your baby’s ability to understand language is about eight months ahead of his speech. This is a major source of frustration, says Meg, as your toddler feels he is not understood.’ All the new things in Maya’s life and no real way to express how she feels about any of them except to say ‘No I don’t want to tea’ and then change her mind again because it’s her prerogative.
I’m going to have to remember these little words of wisdom when next a tantrum strikes.